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In the beginning of ones exploration within a D/s lifestyle, many people begin to break down the conditioning and mental blocks that they have received from family and society, and will often find themselves opening to new, more eccentric ideas of what they may or may not want from a relationship, however, conditioning is a very powerful, deeply rooted thing within our psyche, and to open to what seems to be a more radical approach to things without questioning oneself, would be fairly impossible. In other words, don't ever be afraid to question or to look for answers, for it is through these things that help us to learn and to feel confident in our decisions!
When I first started to break down my walls, I was really wondering about my sanity and had tons of self questions to find answers too like: What is it about me, dating a man who also lives with his female life partner and is free to DO whomever and whatever he wants in between, that I would find so incurably intriguing? And why is the prospect of being taught, mentored, trained or even controlled by that same man a thought that turns my insides into a hot, trembling, wanting lust that I have seldom felt in other circumstances? How could the brooding, painful suffering of tedious self analysis to work through fear, jealousy and some not-so-subtle blows to the ego become this crazy spiritual epiphany of which I have never reached before? Why do two totally opposite feelings, such as pain and pleasure, have that fine line that starts to smudge and gray into a feeling of “vibrating at a higher level”? And, why on earth do so many thousands of people around the globe share, in some way or another, the same sort of thoughts on this kind of lifestyle? What is it about D/s that is making ultra excited, uncontrollably passionate, seriously enlightened and even completely evolved lovers and partners out of the ones who practice it? Why is being in the toughest, most frustrating and complex (albeit sometimes mind blowing and miraculous) type of relationship the ONLY kind of relationship that I crave to be in...even though it goes against what I've envisioned of romantic love?
Well perhaps the answers are in the process.
I want to walk you through the process of becoming, as well as being a Dominant or submissive, as I have experienced it, and perhaps together we can begin to understand just a little bit more about our own all- powerful sexuality and about the many levels of our incredibly beautiful human nature. After all, if we can master ourselves, and understand why we need what we need, aren't we then so much more able to master our relationships with others?
